Joe & Petunia – The Country Code
PETUNIA: Oh, Joe! I have enjoyed our country walk.
JOE: Yes, we've come a long way, Petunia. Look! You can see our tracks right across that yellow cornfield.
PETUNIA: Oh yes! It's ever so nice in this field. I'm glad those cows have gone.
JOE: Aye! They've taken themselves off for a walk down that road – look - through that gate I opened – the one marked "Private".
PETUNIA: Our little Bingo is having a lovely time playing with those sheep. The exercise will do him good.
[sound of enthusiastic barking and baa-ing of terrified sheep]
[Joe throws a stone. A bottle smashes.]
JOE: Hey, hey! I've hit that bottle, Petunia! It smashed up a treat.
PETUNIA: Very clever.
JOE: You know, there's a farmer there with a purple face.
PETUNIA: I expect it's all that sun and the open-air life, Joe.
JOE: Now he's doing one of those country dances.
PETUNIA: I don't think he looks very friendly.
JOE: Maybe you're right. It can't be anything we've done.
PETUNIA: No! But I won't stay where I'm not wanted. Come on, Joe!
FARMER: When folk come out to the country, why oh why won't they follow the Country Code?